Gotcha Day!

Mariah is ours forever and ever! I just had the most happy and the most saddest day of my life! I witnessed a little girl's dream of having a forever family to love her come true, and I also witnessed the devastation and total heartbreak as she watched the only family she has ever know since the day she was found at Bus Station #7, say goodbye and walk away forever. I am emotionally and physically exhausted! Chad as well. The moment began as we waited for the officials to bring all the children in (there were 5 being adopted today). As soon as Miao Zhan (Mariah) walked in with her caregivers she gave me a hug and with the biggest surprise and the absolute sweetest voice you could ever hear, she sang Twinkle Twinkle little star in Chinese, then once finished, she began to sing it in English. The entire song she had memorized in both languages. Tears were streaming. We hugged and kissed and "talked" the best we could with help of the translators. She was so happy to finally meet us. Then the moment came where her caregivers needed to leave and that is when our daughter's heart was torn in two. I have never in my life witnessed such emotional pain. Tears upon tears streamed and streamed. I will never forget what agony she felt. The were all she knew and she loves them all. So Chad and I tried to calm her and she just kept saying a Chinese phrase over and over and over. After about 10 minutes, our guide happened to hear her and said she needed to go potty. Poor thing! She just needed to pee! Once that was over with, she quit crying. But as we left the Civil Affairs building I watched as she looked up at the giant building just waiting for them to come back and get her. I lost it. She is in complete mourning. Once we got back to our hotel room she was great! She was so excited to see all the toys and stuff I brought. I had the pleasure of a manicure with finger nail polish and half of my toes polished. I got a makeover with lots of lipstick and we were totally making progress. We had to go down to the lobby for some paperwork, and once down there, she was completely overwhelmed and just started bawling and these tears did not stop for 2 hours. We just sat in our room, I held her and she just cried and cried. We had to order a transformer for our room so our computer would work, so when the lady brought it to us, she could hear Mariah crying and talking in Chinese. She left, but a few seconds later, she knocked on the door and when Chad opened it she leaned in and said "She is telling you she is hungry!" OK, so we are the worst parents ever!!!!!!! I am definitely going to have to work on my Chinese! We immediately ordered room service, chicken congee and she gulped it right up! Then I busted out the play dough and we played that for a while. Then she got up and took her shoes off, as if to say, well I guess I am not going home, I might as well stay. I decided to get her PJ's on and I let her pick them out, and when I packed I also packed a ballet leotard in case she wanted to dance. Well, she quickly chose the ballet outfit to where and that is how she fell asleep, wearing ballet clothes and a princess crown. And she is still asleep!

Please pray for our little princess. She is grieving a huge loss, her entire past life. We knew this would happen, but nothing can prepare you for the devastation a child feels when their entire world is gone. She does not understand. I know tomorrow brings better, and we are open for what may come! We love this little girl so much. She is so smart. She knows how to write most of the English ABC's. Her drawings are unreal for a 5 year old It was so "funny" but she took out a maker, and some paper and drew the cutest little Asian person, but in the end she put a frown on her face. It broke my heart. I took the marker and changed it to a smile.

Thank you for your prayers and I will keep you posted.

Love,
Mary